Wednesday 6 November 2024

Happiness Dispensary - Lulu Lucknow

November 6, 2024. In the Yogic Ten Commandments, we come across the principle of 'santosha' (happiness) as the 7th one (2nd yama principle).  It would relate to contentment and one's decision to be happy circumstances notwithstanding. 

I was happy and unhappy with my visit to the 'Lulu Lucknow - world of happiness'.   It is not 'a world of happiness', nor 'the world of happiness' - Lulu apparently is not making exclusive claims - it's just 'world of happiness'. Perhaps it is an aspiration for the present world to be happy, not necessarily a reference to the mall aligning with the age-old cultural aspiration of sarve bhavantu sukhinah

For me it was perhaps a 'luck now' thanks to the I.V. of the computer science department - I chose to accompany as an exception. Or else, most likely, it would have been never there at Lulu, Lucknow. 

The fluttering multi-coloured flags (orange, green, sky blue, pink and azure - venerable Yusuf Ali has not stuck to the rainbow pattern) announcing 'world of happiness' create a sense of happiness. The Lulu emblem is not clear as to its symbolism, but it is also multicoloured, presenting hues of joy. The approximately 300 m long building in the East-West direction with a tarred access road of its own leaves more than 10 ft wide walkway for people to walk to the four entrances to this world of happiness. The road itself is about 30 ft wide. A buffer zone of green almost as wide as the road is provided. Then there is a public road, where parking is banned, but as normal Indians of UP state,  people park, saving Rs 30 (bikes) to Rs 50 (cars). To me the parking fee reduces the happiness in this world of happiness. I feel this is extortion and it should have been free of cost for at least those who have made any purchases at the mall. 

I appreciate Yusuf bhai's skill - people have to drive away from their place, pay rather dearly for the goods and eats, and pay for parking their vehicles and yet feel happy about all that.  Perhaps, Lulu has branded itself among the aam Indians in such a way that the mere fact of their shopping there or being there appears to add to their happiness. 

I had no inclination,  to buy or eat anything. However, my companions, used to regular lunch hours wanted to have something, and I had no objection to giving them company by sipping a cup of coffee with them; however, seeing the pricelist with a cup of coffee priced lowest at Rs 115 (not really expensive for the airport or US standards), I didn't really feel inclined to drink coffee, and with that price tag, did not feel like that it was going  to add to my happiness. 

Yusuf bhai is definitely adding happiness to thousands of families especially poor Muslim families (no quarrel on that account, that he favours people from his community), by providing young men (mostly) jobs in his dozens of malls selling happiness and trying to ensure their welfare. In the small town of Doha itself, there were more than 2 dozen Lulu malls, and thousands of Malayalees working there. 

But it is not Yusuf Ali alone who is prompted to sell happiness. On the way back I find a Yamaha bike holding announcing happiness when you purchase a Yamaha motorbike.

However, unlike the typical American outlets where they are well trained to make people feel good even while preventing them from doing things they think would make them happy, here the hundreds of employees appeared still typically and crudely Indian while introducing the very many dont's typical of a mall - entry, exit, bags, scan etc., etc. No smile that announces the much-flaunted happiness of Yusuf bhai. They put people off - but with Indians, who are used to rebuff  every where, sab kuchh chalta hai!

My students return after the 150 minutes of the Lulu tour. For many of them, it's a first time. I found them more eager for this part of the program than the very enriching and informative visit to the UP Police Centre coordinating the emergency calls integrating all emergency services - accident, fire, illness, extortion, threat, woman or child in distress, managing lakhs of calls every day and providing response to them and with a feedback mechanism in place. We were not merely briefed, but also treated to samosa, sandwich and tea.  However, the FY students appeared happier for Yusuf bhai's Lulu attractions than this wonderful
exposure at the spacious UP 112 Bhavan of Police Emergency Management System, facilitated by our alumnus Mr Saurav Verma. But to my happiness, they did have quite a number of questions, though nothing about the complexities of the programming behind the fabulous service, which is expected to be their future domain. Salute to the Akhilesh Yadav government which initiated this service bringing happiness to people in distress free of cost, and the Yogi government which is building on it. 

But just outside the fabulous centre, we are confronted with the everyday UP reality - we had to really struggle to get to the access road to reach the centre in time.  However, the police wallah who was the sentry to the access point, would not let us go.  After 2 very constrained turnarounds, our faculty members with the driver met the policeman who said that there is a rule preventing entry of private vehicles before 11 am! Wow! What dutifulness! However, he asks the driver to remain and the faculty members to leave.  Then the driver is shown a tree across the road, and instructed to leave Rs. 500 there.  And the rule of law that prohibited the entry is bent so easily that the private bus could take a turn to the otherwise inaccessible stretch! Pliability at its height! Before reaching the centre, another sentried point is to be passed - there too, the rule was no longer applicable! What an effective communication system! This is how people make each other happy in UP - the policeman is made happy, and in turn, the driver and the bunch of students (unaware) are made happy! 

The mall displays an app to add to happiness - happiness app! Download that and use it for dining to receive great discounts to add to your happiness! Yusuf bhai's happiness platter beggars description! 

Can the future programmers think of a programme, an app that can generate happiness? Why not? They are the problem solvers for the Brave New World (Huxley) to come! 

Anyway, I am happy with the outing though the much-touted mall could not provide me a soda maker under its roof by which I thought of adding to the unseen happiness of the planet, addressing the need of my fellow dwellers for a fizzy drink, while not adding to plastic pollution. I ended up purchasing toffees sans wrappers for my desk, to encourage people who come there to share their achievements and frustrations - but that does not make me very happy. The boy manning the counter merrily announces the price as Rs. 200 something; my relief is momentary, as he mentions the quantity - for 100 grams. I am mortified - as per my non-mall Indian expectation, it would have been the price for a kilogram! Yet I get some 200 grams in a neat paper box. That is how Yusuf bhai and his ilk of entrepreneurs weave their web of happiness - making even the disinclined passer-by a (potential) customer/consumer irrespective of his 'utility' concerns!

Sunday 27 October 2024

Liberated in Jesus to be Liberators in this World

Sunday October 24, 2024 Tenth Sunday of Elijah - Sliba - Moses 

Dt 11:1-7

The Deuteronomy passage is about the nation of Israel as a people being liberated by a powerful God, who moves with them (saath).  A few powerful words in the Hindi version - saamarthya and shakti (power and skill - employing power effectively) and saath - accompanying - as cloud, as light; delivering through miraculous events - natural phenomena behaving in exceptional manners - oceans divide, flow stops, day extends, bread and meat showered.  Great experience of deliverance, which is not available to all generations - hence, narratives and recountings!  Though nothing is comparable to the first hand experience, even today, the narrated, the written word of God, is powerful to deliver!! May the experience of the powerful God with us be mine, be yours!! 

Matthew 12:22-32 

With Jesus, the history of deliverance comes alive again! God's saath, saamarthya and shakti are experienced with a fellow human being liberated from the bondages to the freedoms of sight and speech! What a transforming moment in life! 

The ideal, challenging, charming option is to be:

a liberator that sets people free to see - around them - the physical nature, its diversity, its beauty; 

a liberator who frees people to see within themselves - introspection leading to the insight as to who I am! 

a liberator who frees people to see beyond the frames, to see the connections and the connectedness - from the phenomenon of 'reading the cloud' to the need 'to read the signs of the times'. 

That presuppo ses the liberator to be liberated. A call to continuous reflection - action - renewal cycle. Being the limited human within time-space, you are susceptible to fall into easy bondages. To realise them, and make conscientious efforts to free oneself is the precondition of being a true liberator. But that requires the saath of the indweller - the awakening of the kundalini  through the cycles to the sahasrara - to enlighten one as the annointed (the child of God); where the one and the oneness beyond the many and the diverse is made visible.  Prayer to deliver me from being the prisoner of my instincts and perceptions, but to ever go beyond!

To be 'them' also is not a bad option - 'They' brought a demoniac to Jesus.  This simple channelizing is also an act of liberation or facilitation of liberation. Humble task of physically bringing someone, referring someone to richers sources of life, and bringing someone to the experience of strength in Jesus - the independence being gained in the dependence of Jesus.  Making one free. If only, I could at least be that channel. It presupposes their conviction, their knowledge and trust in the power of Jesus. Lord, I can only pray strengthen my unbelief! 

For any good, there are any number of detractors - is this statement true? I am not sure. In today's world of social media, the number of likes and thumbs up and positive comments seem to indicate the world is becoming more positive towards goodness in its very many shades!! However, perhaps, even when such voices are fewer, they are louder!! And under them the positivity get suppressed and submerged. 

The response of Jesus is worth emulation by any leader, any diplomat, any learner, any seeker - No reaction! Jesus responds with calm logic: 

1. A house divided against itself - if the devil is to expel the devil, how can she spread her domain? 

2. If it is through the devil, then how do they explain similar healing efforts by their own folks? (That indicates the recourse to the non-invasive and inner-powers for healing or wholeness, from early history of human beings)

But Jesus returns to his mission using the plot - if its by the power of the Spirit of God, then realise that the reign of God is upon you!! It is already there, every step in liberating self and others is a step towards establishing God's reign, read, the reign of goodness, firmly!!

Jesus brings a warning similar to the warning given in the Deuteronomy text: the worst a human being can fare is to resist God's spirit.  That is persistence with untruth, willingness to be open to truth, covering up truth and siding with untruth.  Disciples of Christ are asked to be open to the truth - scientifically revealed as well as those that are beyond science.  As Jesus himself would say elsewhere: 'Truth will set you free' (Jn 8:31). 

I Thes. 5:12-24 The third reading from the Apostle Paul buttresses these aspects with very specific injunctions for liberated and liberating life, in the company of the arch-liberator.  These are worth learning byheart (hrdisth) and translating into daily life. 

1. respect those who are labouring among you and whoare over you in the Lord and admonish you, and to show esteem for them with special love on account of their work (12 & 13)

2. Be at peace among yourselves (13b)

3. Mutual support & correction - to admonish the idle, cheer the fainthearted, support the weak, be patient with all (14)

4. See that no one returns evil for evil (15a);

5. rather always seek good each other and for all (15b). refrain from every kind of evil (22)

6. Rejoice always (16)

7. Pray without ceasing (17)

8. In all circumstances give thanks, for this ithe will of God for you in Christ Jesus (18). 

9. Do not quench the Spirit (19) - also ref. Mtt 12: 31)

10. Do not despise prophetic utternaces (20)

11. Test everything; retain what is good (21).

Prayer: O God of peace, revealed Jesus our Lord and forerunner, make us perfectly holy and may we entirely, spirit, soul and body, be preserved blamess for the coming of your reign in our midst (23). We confess that you who chose us are faithful and though we are unworthy, with you we can accomplish it (24). 



Sunday 20 October 2024

Pati aur Patni - Wow!! Karwa Chauth through SDG Lens

Oct. 20, 2024 Sunday

'Pati, patni aur woh' - is a popular Hindi movie of 2019 by Mudassar Aziz (Kartik Aryan, Bhumi Pednekar & Ananya Panday) which was a commercial hit and entertainer with fidelity in a marital relationship being the central theme.  The title had been very popular after the 1978 movie of the same name by  B.R. Chopra with Sanjeev Kumar, Vidya Sinha and Rajneeta Kaur in the lead roles. 

Today, on the day of Karva Chauth, reading about it in 'amar ujala' I was inspired to reflect on the pati-patni relationships, and with several of pati-patni of my own generation and those prior to me on the canvas, I cannot but say 'wow'! What commitment, what forbearance, and hopefully, great contentment and mutual enrichment!  I hope, the modern day believers who practice such religious traditions enlarge its scope to make it a celebration of mutual commitment, devotion and support in marital life, encouraging gender equality (SDG 5)for the well-being of families, the well-being of all.

Deva-daanav battles are a prominent feature of one of the dominant Hindu traditions. And the narrative is in favour of the Devas, invariably they are the protagonists; and the Danavs, the antagonists, even when some such fights are triggered off by the villainy of some of the Devs!  So the story is about such a fight and the Devs were losing.  They were desperate, approached Brhama, who finding no way out, suggested that if the consorts of all the Devas would fast and pray with a clean heart for the victory of their husbands, And they all did exactly that - and lo, the losing battle was won around the moon rise on the fourth day of the waning phase of Moon in Kaartik month (Krishna paksh Chaturthi). It is kept by all suhagins (those 'blessed' married women with their husbands alive - one of the very few uniquely Indian concepts of the Indian grand narrative, howsoever obscurantist that may sound; modern India has not contributed a single new concept to the world) fasting the whole day without even water till the moon rise, for the long life, health and all good fortune of the husbands.  The fast is broken by receiving water from the husband at moon rise. There is a tradition that considers an unbroken 12 to 16 years of this observance; or life-long. 

The story is replicated with Draupadi having kept the karva chauth fast leading to the victory of the Pandavas in the Mahabharata battle. 

The Internet provides other stories as well: Queen Veeravati, newly married,  kept a strict fast for her husband, but fainted on account of exhaustion, and her seven brothers, not able to bear her suffer, convinced her that the moon had risen and made her break the fast. No sooner had she done that she receives the news of the untimely death of her husband, and on her way to her husband, she is met with Lord Shiva and Parvati, from whom she gathers that the false breaking of the fast as the cause. She devotion is rewarded by Parvati bringing the prince back to life, still ailing. She finds her husband in a delicate condition with needles all over his body. She is said to have kept the fast of Chauth in each of the 12 months that followed her husband's revival, and she patiently picks out one needle a day, leaving just one for the next Karva Chauth.  When she had gone out for the karva puja, her maid removed the remaining needle, and gaining consciousness, mistakes her as his queen and the real queen as the maid.  Veeravati's genuineness finally wins the husband back and queenship is restored to him.

The other story is about Godess Karva whose husband was killed by a crocodile while bathing in river Thungabhadra.  She tied the crocodile to a tree using raw yarn with the strength of her chastity and dedication, and prayed to Yama for reviving her husband. Yama didn't dare to provoke her anger and brought him back to life, while sending the crocodile to the next world. It is the inspiration for Karva Chauth, where married women fast and pray to Goddess Karva for the wellbeing of their husbands,  offering arghya to the moon.  

I was happy to read Yogesh Kumar Goyal (Amar Ujala Oct. 20, 2024 p. 11) commenting that there are today enlightened husbands who join their wives - this appears healthy, in a practice otherwise reinforcing exploitative patriarchal values. Ideally, this should happen - fasting in an otherwise overconsuming culture is itself a good health practice. Combining it with prayers with a clean heart for the well-being of the life partner is doubly healthy.  If the entire Hindu fold observes this (with this intent the whole world should do that), avoiding all food and all cooking for a day, it can immensely enhance the well-being of the common home (vasudha - which indeed is considered the family, according to an Indian axiom).  Hence, for me, it is a celebration of SDG 3 - good health and well-being. 

The images I found of the feast generally project a fasting woman waiting for the moon to rise, at times, accompanied by her (caring) husband. However, I found a few pictures of women gathering around puja materials and food.  Though the celebration in itself appears to be the celebration of patriarchal values, at least for one day it is a woman's world for themselves - though centred around the husband figure. It appears to be their fellowship and their space, which are very often absent even in this modern world.  While I don't feel, we, in the South of India, are missing anything by not having Karwa Chauth, yet bearing this spirit, zindabad karwa chauth! 

https://www.memeraki.com/blogs/posts/karva-chauth-sacred-stories-behind-the-fasting-ritual

images: https://in.images.search.yahoo.com/search/images?p=karva+chauth+-+images&fr=mcafee&type=E211IN885G91648&imgurl=https%3A%2F%2Fimages.thequint.com%2Fthequint%2F2019-10%2F9b4233d0-b074-4475-a78a-ffe541128d5e%2FiStock_1180633448.jpg%3Fauto%3Dformat%252Ccompress#id=91&iurl=https%3A%2F%2Fdata1.ibtimes.co.in%2Fen%2Ffull%2F540135%2Fkarva-chauth-2014.jpg%3Fw%3D1200&action=click

Saturday 12 October 2024

Importance of being Baby at Rajagiri


രാജഗിരിയുടെ ബേബി(ചേട്ടൻ)മാർ  

ബേബി ചേട്ടനെ കൊച്ചിക്കാർ CMIക്കാർ  ആരാണ് അറിയാത്തത് ? എല്ലാരും തന്നെ അറിയും. വിശാലമായ 22 ഏക്കറിൽ ഒരു നിഴലായി നീങ്ങുന്ന - ഏറെ ജീവികൾക്ക് താങ്ങും, മറ്റേതാനും ജീവികൾക്ക് തേങ്ങലും ഏകി - വലിയ ബഹളമില്ലാതെ നിറഞ്ഞാടുന്ന നിഴൽ.  

രണ്ടു നൂറ്റാണ്ടുകളിലെ അനേക ദശാബ്ദങ്ങൾ നീണ്ട നിശ്ശബ്ദ സേവനത്തിന്റെ കണ്ണികളിൽ അവസാനത്തതായിരിക്കും ബേബി ചേട്ടൻ -  അപ്രകാരമുള്ള മറ്റു രാജഗിരി മനുഷ്യർ (Rajagiri Men) എൻറെ പരിമിതമായ ഗണനയിൽ, വടക്കു ഭാഗത്തായി driver ജോസ് ചേട്ടനും,  മർമ്മാണി മൂത്ത്  സർവാണിയായ മരക്കാറും, തെക്കു വശത്ത് സ്വല്പം കൂടെ ഒച്ചയോടു കൂടി സേവിയർ സാറും, പൗലോസ് ചേട്ടനും.  ജോസ് ചേട്ടനും, മരക്കാറും കാലയവനികക്കുള്ളിൽ മറഞ്ഞു കഴിഞ്ഞു. 

അപൂർവ്വമായിത്തീർന്ന കളമശ്ശേരി സന്ദര്ശനങ്ങളിൽ ഒന്ന് കയറി ഇറങ്ങുന്ന വീടായിരുന്നു ജോസ് ചേട്ടൻറ്റേത് - അവിടെ നിന്ന് തന്നെ അന്വേഷിക്കാമായിരുന്ന ബേബി ചേട്ടൻറെ  വീടും. ബേബി ചേട്ടൻ കാമ്പസിൽ തുടർന്നിരുന്നതു കൊണ്ട് അവിടെ അന്വേഷിക്കേണ്ട കാര്യം ഇല്ലായിരുന്നു.  ഈ 75 വയസ്സിലെ 65 വർഷവും ബേബി ചേട്ടൻ കളമശ്ശേരി രാജഗിരി ആശ്രമത്തിൻറെ സേവനത്തിൽ ആയിരുന്നു. ഒരു അത്യപൂർവ്വമായ സേവനചരിത്രം.  ആശ്രമത്തിൻറെ ആശ്രിതൻ ബേബിച്ചേട്ടനോ, അതോ ബേബിച്ചേട്ടൻറെ ആശ്രിതർ ആശ്രമവും അതിനോട് ബന്ധപ്പെട്ട എല്ലാവരുമോ എന്ന് സംശയം.  നിഴലത്തുള്ള മറ്റൊരു മുഖമായിരുന്നു മരക്കാർ. ആശ്രമം തന്നെ തുടങ്ങുന്നതിന് മുൻപ് ആ വളപ്പിൽ വന്നു ചേർന്നവരാണവർ ഇരുവരും. 

ബേബിച്ചേട്ടൻറെ  വിരുത് ഇത്ര പ്രായമായിട്ടും ബേബിയായി ഇരിക്കുന്നു എന്നത് തന്നെ.  ഒരു ബേബിയായി ഇവിടെയെത്തി - 57 വർഷങ്ങൾക്ക് ശേഷവും പേരിൽ മാത്രമല്ല, പെരുമാറ്റത്തിലും -  ഒരു ശിശുസഹജമായ നിഷ്കപടമായ - പടം ആവശ്യമില്ലാത്ത ഇടപെടലുകൾ. 

ഈ 57ൻറെ കണക്ക് എങ്ങിനെയാണ് എന്നറിയില്ല. ബേബിച്ചേട്ടൻറെ ഭാഷ്യം അനുസരിച്ച് 10 വയസ്സിൽ അപ്പൻറെ കൂടെ എത്തിയതാണ്.  അപ്പൻ ഉതുപ്പ് ചേട്ടൻ ചുണങ്ങുവേലിയിലെ തേവര ആശ്രമം വക റബ്ബർ തോട്ടത്തിൻറെ നടത്തിപ്പുകാരൻ ആയിരുന്നു. അരീക്കുഴ പാലക്കീഴിൽ വീട്ടിൽ നിന്ന്  അപ്പൻറെ കൂടെ ഇറങ്ങുമ്പോൾ അക്ഷരജ്ഞാനം പോലുമില്ല.  സ്‌കൂളിൽ പോയിട്ടില്ല.  അക്ഷര കാര്യം അവ്വിധം തന്നെയെങ്കിലും, മറ്റ് നിരവധി കാര്യങ്ങൾ കണ്ടും കേട്ടും നേടിയിരിക്കുന്നു. 4 മാസക്കാലം തേവരയിൽ സഹായിയായിക്കഴിഞ്ഞപ്പോൾ, സാലസ് അച്ചൻ പറഞ്ഞു: കളമശ്ശേരിയിൽ സ്ഥലം വാങ്ങിയിട്ടുണ്ട്.  നീ അങ്ങോട്ട് വാ. അച്ചൻറെ പ്രസിദ്ധമായ അമേരിക്കൻ (?) ഫിയറ്റ് കാറിൽ തന്നെ കളമശ്ശേരിയിൽ എത്തി.  ഇന്നത്തെ രാജഗിരിക്കാർക്ക് ചിന്തിക്കാൻ ആവാത്ത സ്ഥലം. കാട് തന്നെ.  S.P. ലൂയിസിൻറെ (ലൂയിസ് സായ്‌വ്) കയ്യിൽനിന്നും ഏകദേശം 60 ക. ഒരു സെന്റിന് കൊടുത്താണ് ഈ ഭൂമി കൈവശമാക്കിയത് അത്രേ!   ഈ ഇരുപതോളം ഏക്കറിൽ 22 കുടികിടപ്പുകാർ ഉണ്ടായിരുന്നു.  പറമ്പു തരാം -  കുടി ഒഴിപ്പിക്കൽ അച്ചന്മാരുടെ കാര്യം എന്നായിരുന്നത്രെ സായ്‌വിൻറെ വയ്പ്പ്. പല മാർഗ്ഗങ്ങൾ അവലംബിച്ച്, വിവിധ ജാതി മതസ്ഥരായ എല്ലാവരെയും പറമ്പിൽ നിന്നും ഒഴിപ്പിച്ചു. ഏകദേശം അഞ്ച് ഏക്കർ കൈവശം വച്ചിരുന്ന ഒരു ക്രൈസ്‌തവ കുടുംബത്തെ ഒഴിപ്പിക്കൽ ആയിരുന്നു ഏറ്റം ശ്രമകരം. പലവിധ സഹായങ്ങൾ ചെയ്തും മറ്റുമാണ് അവരെയൊക്കെ ഒഴിപ്പിച്ചത്. 

പിന്നെ തെളിക്കലായിരുന്നു അടുത്ത ഘട്ടം - കയറിച്ചെല്ലാൻ ഒരു വഴിപോലും  ഇല്ല. കാട്ടിനുള്ളിലെ ഒരു ഒറ്റയടി പാത മാത്രം. കുറുക്കൻ, പാമ്പുകൾ - യഥേഷ്ടം. ഒറ്റപ്പെട്ട ചില പ്രതിഷ്ഠകളും ഉണ്ട്.  വന്മരങ്ങളും, പ്ലാവും ഒക്കെയുണ്ട്.  അവയൊക്കെ തെളിക്കണം. 

വന്ന് അധിക നാൾ കഴിയുന്നതിനു മുൻപേ തന്നെ തുടങ്ങിയതാണ് പന്നി വളർത്തൽ - തേവര നിന്നും അഞ്ചെട്ട് കുഞ്ഞുങ്ങളെ കൊണ്ടുവന്ന് തുടങ്ങിയ ഭക്ഷ്യോത്പാദന യജ്ഞം ഇടക്കൊരു ഘട്ടം ഒഴിച്ച് ഇന്ന് വരെ തുടരുന്നു.  ആശ്രമം വളപ്പിലെ മൃഗങ്ങൾ, മരങ്ങൾ - അവയായിരുന്നു ബേബി ചേട്ടൻറെ മുഖ്യ പ്രവർത്തന മേഖല. നടാനും, നന്നാക്കാനും, പോറ്റാനും, പൊതിക്കാനും, അറക്കാനും, മുറിക്കാനും, കയറാനും, ഇറങ്ങാനും, വെട്ടാനും, കെട്ടാനും എല്ലാം ബേബി ചേട്ടൻ - കയ്യും, കാലും ആയുധമാക്കിയും, ആധുനികവും പാരമ്പരാഗതവുമായ ആയുധങ്ങൾ - യന്ത്രങ്ങൾ ഉപയോഗിച്ചും തന്ത്രങ്ങൾ പയറ്റിയും  - 6 ദശകങ്ങളുടെ സേവനം. 

ഞാൻ തേവര ആശ്രമവാസിയായതിൽ പിന്നെ, മാവേലിയുടെ വരവു പോലെ വർഷത്തിൽ ഒന്നോ രണ്ടോ പ്രാവശ്യം ബേബി ചേട്ടൻ തേവരയിൽ വരുന്നത് ശ്രദ്ധിച്ചു - മാനുഷർക്ക് മനോദരാദി രഞ്ജനവും, മൃഗവൃന്ദങ്ങൾക്ക് മരണഭയവും നൽകികൊണ്ടാവും ആ വരവ്. പക്ഷെ, അവിടെയും വലിയ ഒച്ചപ്പാടില്ല. 

ഇതിനിടെ 25 വയസ്സിൽ ആരക്കുഴ നിന്ന് ഒരു മിടുക്കിയെ ജീവിത പങ്കാളിയാക്കി - അന്നംക്കുട്ടി. അന്നംക്കുട്ടി ചേച്ചിക്ക് SSLC പൂർത്തിയാക്കിയതിന്റെ അഭിമാനം ഇന്നും ഉണ്ട്. മക്കൾ മഞ്ജുവും സഞ്ജുവും - നന്നേ ചെറുപ്പത്തിൽ തന്നെ അവർക്ക് ആശ്രമം, രാജഗിരി സ്‌കൂളിൽ അവരുടെ വിദ്യാഭ്യാസ യോഗ്യതക്ക് ഉതകിയ ജോലി നൽകി.  മൂത്ത ആൾ, ഇന്നും തുടരുന്നു. ഇളയ ആൾ, ഭർതൃഗ്രഹമായ കരിമണ്ണൂരിൽ സ്ഥിരതാമസമാക്കിയതോടെ, രാജഗിരി വിട്ടു. അവരെല്ലാം നന്നായിക്കഴിയുന്നു.  50 വർഷം ഒരുമിച്ച് ജീവിച്ചത് പൂർത്തിയാക്കുന്ന ചാരിതാർത്ഥ്യം ചേച്ചിയുടെ മുഖത്ത് വായിക്കാം - ജനവരി 6, 1975.  ആ വിവാഹം ബേബി ചേട്ടനെ ക്നാനായ സമുദായത്തിൽനിന്ന് പുറത്തക്കി. Good luck or bad luck?  പ്രഭാതം മുതൽ പ്രദോഷം വരെ, തിങ്കൾ മുതൽ ഞായർ വരെ നീളുന്ന ആശ്രമത്തിൻറെ ശതം കാര്യ വ്യഗ്രതയിൽ ബേബി ചേട്ടന്  അതൊന്നും അളക്കാൻ നേരം കിട്ടിയിട്ടില്ല. 

എൻറെ അപൂർവ്വ സന്ദർശനങ്ങളിലെ ചവിട്ടു സൈക്കിൾ ചുറ്റലിൽ ആണ്  ഞാൻ ബേബിച്ചേട്ടൻറെ വീടിന് മുൻപിൽ നിർത്തിയത്.  വഴിയോട് ചേർന്ന് നിൽക്കുന്ന വീട്.  ഏകദേശം 10 വർഷം മുൻപ് (2014?) ഒന്ന് മെച്ചപ്പെടുത്തി.  ആശ്രമം സഹായിച്ചു എന്ന് വേണം നിനക്കാൻ.  പക്ഷെ, പണ്ട് കൊവേന്ത കൊടുത്ത ഈ സ്ഥലം ഇന്ന് PWD റോഡ് പുറമ്പോക്ക് ആയി തിട്ടപ്പെടുത്തിയിരിക്കുന്നത് ഒരു ആകുലത തന്നെ. കലക്ടറേറ്റ് വരെയൊക്കെ പിടിച്ച് നോക്കിയെങ്കിലും വഴങ്ങുന്നില്ല - ഒരു ഒഴിപ്പിക്കൽ ഭീഷണി നിലനിൽക്കുന്നു. 

ബേബിച്ചേട്ടൻ എത്തിയിട്ടില്ല. അഞ്ച് മണിയായി. ഒരു 15 മിനിറ്റിൽ എത്തും എന്ന് ചേച്ചി. കയറി ഇരിക്കാൻ എന്നെ നിർബന്ധിക്കുന്നു. ഒട്ടൊന്നാലോചിച്ചിട്ട്, ഞാൻ കയറി ഇരുന്നു. ചേച്ചി അകത്തുപോയി gas അണച്ചു.  പയർ വേകിക്കയാണ്. നോട്ടം വേണം. പിന്നെയാകാം. ചെറിയ പരാതി - അച്ചൻ  ഒരിക്കലും അകത്ത് കയറിയിട്ടില്ല - 2003ൽ ഇത് പോലോരിക്കൽ വന്നു.  ഞാൻ ജനലക്കൽ നിന്ന് കയറി വന്നിരിക്കാൻ പറഞ്ഞു. അച്ചൻ  ഇരുന്നില്ല. അന്ന് ആലുവയിൽ വച്ച് വണ്ടി മുട്ടി വലതുകാൽ മൊത്തവും, വലതു കയ്യും ഒടിഞ്ഞ് ഇരിപ്പാണ്. ബേബി ചേട്ടനും അപകടം പറ്റി - മുഖം ഇടിച്ച് - എന്നാൽ കാര്യമായ പരിക്കുകൾ ഒന്നും ഉണ്ടായില്ല.  എനിക്ക് ജാള്യത - നമ്മുടെ കൂടെ നമുക്ക് വേണ്ടി, പണിയെടുക്കുന്ന ഒരാൾക്ക് ഇത്ര വലിയ ആപത്ത് പറ്റിയിട്ട് പരിസരത്ത് താമസിച്ചിട്ടും നമ്മൾ അറിയുന്നു പോലുമില്ല.  ഇത്രയും ഭീകരമായ അപകടത്തിൻറെ  കാര്യമായ വാങ്ങൽ സംസാരത്തിലോ  ചലനത്തിലോ കാണുന്നില്ല. ദൈവത്തിന് സ്തുതി! 

സഹോദരങ്ങൾ: ബേബിച്ചേട്ടന്റെ നേരെ ഇളയ സഹോദരിയുണ്ട്.  വിവാഹിതയായി കുടുംബ ജീവിതം നയിക്കുന്നു. ഒരു മകൾ സന്യാസിനിയാണ്. നേരെ ഇളയ സഹോദരൻ മാത്യു കളമശ്ശേരിയിൽ ഏതാനും വര്ഷം ബോർഡിങ്ങിൽ സേവനം ചെയ്തിട്ട്, തേവര സേക്രഡ് ഹാർട്ട് കോളേജിൽ ജോലി ലഭിച്ച്, അവിടെ നിന്നും വിരമിച്ച് സ്വസ്ഥജീവിതം നയിക്കുന്നു.  ഞങ്ങൾ സഹപ്രവർത്തകരായിരുന്നു ഏകദേശം ഒരു ദശാബ്ദക്കാലം. മാത്യുവിന്റെ മകൻ മികച്ച നർത്തകൻ കൂടെയായ ബോണി തന്റെ പൂർവ്വകലാലയത്തിൽ  കൊമേഴ്‌സ് അദ്ധ്യാപകനാണ്.  ഏറ്റവും ഇളയ മറ്റൊരു അനുജൻ അരിക്കുഴയിൽ തന്നെ. അയാളുടെ ഒരു മകൻ വൈദിക വിദ്യാർത്ഥിയാണ്. മറ്റൊരു മകൾ സന്ന്യാ സിനിയും. 

1989 മുതൽ മുറിഞ്ഞും കൂടിയും കഴിഞ്ഞ എൻറെ കളമശ്ശേരി ജീവിതത്തിൽ ബേബിച്ചേട്ടൻ മിക്കവാറും ഒരു കുശലം, ഒരു ചിരിയിൽ ഒതുങ്ങിയ സമ്പർക്കമാണെങ്കിലും - അതിലും വലിയൊരു ആത്മ ബന്ധം ഉള്ളതായി തോന്നുന്നു.  പരാതികൾ   കേട്ടിട്ടില്ല - ബേബിച്ചേട്ടനിൽനിന്നും, ബേബി ചേട്ടനെക്കുറിച്ചും.  കളമശ്ശേരിയുടെ ഈ കുന്നിനെ രാജഗിരിയാക്കി മാറ്റുന്നതിൽ നിശ്ശബ്ദ സേവനം കാഴ്ചവച്ച ബേബി ചേട്ടനെയും, അത്ര തന്നെ വർഷങ്ങളുടെ റെക്കോർഡ് ഒഴിച്ച് മറ്റെല്ലാ രീതിയിലും സേവനം ചെയ്ത് കടന്നു പോയ മരക്കാറിനെയും സ്നേഹത്തോടെ ഓർക്കുന്നു.  75 വയസ്സിൽ ബേബി ചേട്ടൻ പഴയതിലും മിടുക്കനായി കാണപ്പെടുന്നു. പ്രായാധിക്യമൊന്നും മനസ്സിലോ, മുഖത്തോ, എടുപ്പിലോ ഇല്ല. ഔദ്യോഗികമായി സേവന നിവൃത്തിയായി - പക്ഷെ സേവന കഥ തുടരുകയാണ്  - ad multos annos! പശ്യേമ ശരദശതം!!

P.S. ഞാൻ ഈ കുറിപ്പ് രാജഗിരിയുടെ ബേബി ചേട്ടന്മാരെക്കുറിച്ച്  
പറയാമെന്നോർത്താണ്‌  .തുടങ്ങിയത്. അതിൽ, ഇന്നുള്ളവർക്ക് സുപരിചിതനായ ബേബിച്ചേട്ടനെക്കുറിച്ച് ഞാൻ  പരാമർശിച്ചു. മറ്റൊരു ബേബിച്ചേട്ടനെ നമ്മിൽ വളരെക്കുറിച്ചു പേർക്കേ അറിയൂ.  പടിക്കപ്പറമ്പിൽ ബേബി ചേട്ടൻ (P.D. ISAAC), സെപ്റ്റംബർ 11ന് നിര്യാതനായി.  89 വയസ്സായിരുന്നു.  ബേബി ചേട്ടൻെറ അപ്പൻ കുട്ടൻ ചേട്ടൻ, തേവര  കൊവേന്തയുടെ നോട്ടക്കാരനായിരുന്നു എന്നാണ് ഞാൻ മനസ്സിലാക്കിയിട്ടുള്ളത്. ചെറുപ്പം മുതൽ കണ്ടിട്ടുണ്ടെങ്കിലും  വെള്ള മുണ്ടും ഷർട്ടും രണ്ടാം മുണ്ടും ധരിച്ചു കണ്ടിരുന്ന ആ സൗമ്യനായ മനുഷ്യനുമായി ഒരിക്കലും സംസാരിക്കാൻ എനിക്ക് ഇട വന്നിട്ടില്ല. 
സാലസ് അച്ചന്റെ ശിക്ഷണത്തിൽ അദ്ദേഹത്തിൻറെ വിശ്വസ്തനായ പേർസണൽ അസിസ്റ്റൻറ് അല്ലെങ്കിൽ സെക്രെട്ടറിയായി തേവര കോളേജിൻറെ പ്രാരംഭകാലത്തും പിന്നീട് രാജഗിരിയിൽ ആശ്രമം തുടങ്ങിയ ഘട്ടത്തിലും കൂടെ നടന്ന, സാലസച്ചന്റെ ഒരു മനസാക്ഷി സൂക്ഷിപ്പുകാരനായി മാറിയ ബേബിച്ചേട്ടൻ - പിന്നീട് ഒരു അവസരം വന്നപ്പോൾ ഒരു കമ്പനി ഉദ്യോഗം തരപ്പെട്ടത് നിരസിക്കാതെ അത് കൈവശമാക്കാൻ അച്ചൻ അനുവദിച്ചു. കമ്പനിയിൽനിന്നും വിരമിച്ചശേഷം, ഒരു ദശാബ്ദത്തിലേറെ തേവര അച്ചടി ശാലയുടെ കണക്കുകൾ ക്രമീകരിക്കുന്ന ജോലി നിർവ്വഹിച്ചു. കോളേജിൻറെ വളർച്ച വളരെ ആഗ്രഹിച്ച ഒരു വ്യക്തിയായിരുന്നു. ആരംഭകാലത്തെ സാലസ് സ്വപ്‌നങ്ങൾ എല്ലാം അറിഞ്ഞിരുന്ന ഒരാൾ. അദ്ദേഹത്തിൽനിന്നും അറിയാൻ ഒരുപിടി ചോദ്യങ്ങൾ ഞാൻ തയ്യാറാക്കി വച്ചിരുന്നു. ജൂണിൽ കണ്ടപ്പോൾ, അടുത്ത കാഴ്ചയിൽ കുറെ സംസാരിക്കാനുണ്ട് എന്നൊക്കെ ഉറപ്പിച്ചാണ് പോയത്. ആഗസ്റ്റ് മാസം വീണ്ടും കടന്നു പോയപ്പോൾ, വിശ്വസിക്കാനാവാത്തവിധം അവശനായി മാറിയിരുന്നു ബേബി ചേട്ടൻ. ഏതാനും ആഴ്ചകൾ കൂടി കഴിഞ്ഞ് ആ അറിവുകൾ എല്ലാം കൂടെ കൊണ്ട് കൂട് വിട്ട്  പോയി.  Man proposes, God disposes! 

ഇപ്പോഴത്തെ പ്രതിഭ ഹോസ്റ്റലിന് നേരെ മുൻപിലുള്ള വീടാണ് ബേബി ചേട്ടൻറെത്. ഭാര്യ അതിനും ഒരു മാസം മുൻപ്  വിട പറഞ്ഞിരുന്നു. ഇപ്പോൾ മകൻ ഡേവിസും കുടുംബവും അവിടെ താമസിക്കുന്നു. 

ബേബി ചേട്ടൻറെ രണ്ടാമത്തെ മകൾ നിർമ്മല രാജഗിരി അയൽവാസിയാണ്. രണ്ട് മക്കളും രാജഗിരിയിൽ പഠിച്ച് എൻജിനീയറും ഡോക്റ്ററും ആയി സേവനം ചെയ്യുന്നു. ഭർത്താവ് തോമസ്, എന്നും ആശ്രമദേവാലയത്തോട് ഒട്ടി നിന്ന വ്യക്തി - അർബുദത്തെ വിശ്വാസ സ്ഥൈര്യത്തോടെ നേരിട്ട് അതിന് കീഴടങ്ങി.  നിർമ്മല public sector കമ്പനിയിലെ എൻജിനീയർ ഉദ്യോഗത്തിൽ നിന്നും വിരമിച്ച് മക്കളോടൊത്ത് താമസിക്കുന്നു. 


Monday 7 October 2024

Retirement - Blues and Greens

Post Retirement Blues 

Ready for Them

From a very active and engaging life (not even time for regular meals or games – very dear to my heart) to a life of no specific responsibilities (read, task involving others) – that is a drastic change, could be challenging as well. I was kind of prepared for that, or else it would have been a major set back. In spite of that there is a feel of ‘being of no use – unwanted’ and repeated self-suggestion regarding one’s call and identity comes handy. 

Your call and business is ‘to follow Christ’ (Jn 21:22) and proclaim the good news (Lk 4:18; 10:5-9).  As a normal human being, you feel embarrassed when the question is asked, ‘what is your next assignment, what is your post?’, when there is hardly anything clear about it. It can easily lead one to despondency and self-doubt, unless you are prepared for that. I can also easily get into a complaining and victim mode – which I did at times – of being neglected/sidelined or under/unutilised. 

But this is also a predicament and challenge – and we realise that by our choice we have made ourselves vulnerable and powerless. People much younger to you in age and experience make decisions regarding our destiny, and we are bound to willingly give into that.  Though it is indeed tough, if the call is taken seriously as to that of ‘following Christ’ (imitation of Christ) and of ‘proclaiming the good news’, this is possible, irrespective of the situation only that one has to gear up to that and make oneself prepared for that every day.

Thus, in most of the situations of the embarrassment caused by the question of your next assignment, your post, are you being demoted, what are you going to do next etc. I countered with a genuine answer, though not a happy one from my end: of continuing to live my religious-priestly life – of prayer, recollection and farming (manual labour).

I would have been very happy 

Strategies of Coping

I had thought out this, and had tried to preclude such embarrassment by voluntarily opting for something which was thought to be challenging – to go to an underdeveloped (?) region for pastoral ministry or evangelization.  I chose to go to Ecuador, where, it is being told that such services are required. But if something else was warranted from the part of the province, I expressed my willingness to go with that.  I asked for a kind of break for a few months so as to go around India and see the country for myself. The little money that trickled in from various sources other than the regular salary, or some token income from pastoral ministry – training or talks etc. and some amount which was received as annual festival allowance put together was thought sufficient to meet the possible expenditure, without the house or province having to pay anything extra.

But I expressed willingness to stop the trip and come back, anytime, if my presence was wanted for any of the said ministries. Alas… my fond hope of being asked to stop and come back was in vain… Nobody cared a hoot if I came back or not and I had to kind of persuade the provincial to follow it up with their concerned contacts as to whether my presence was required or else let me free to be where I was wanted (e.g., a couple of HEIs run by the CMIs in North India or in the social service forum of the North Eastern dioceses).  The authorities were still bidding time, and didn’t find anything amiss in my being just free to do anything! Having no such surety as to when and where I should be going I felt like an unwanted person hanging around.  Finally, after much dilly-dallying, I was asked to submit my papers and passport copy for processing for an appointment as the director or principal of a school.  Which I did in a matter of a day… Another month, and no response.  I said to the province that if this was not their need, let me have my choices.  He got back to them, and came back with another set of instructions to contact some other agent for further processing. Then, after another week or so, they come back with the instruction to get a bona fide certificate from my university.  Again, this was accomplished in another week.  As things were thus moving at a snail’s pace, I requested the provincial to let me go to the NEDSSS (North Eastern Diocesan Social Service Society) to see if I could be of some use there or to learn something new from there, which he agreed to.

Again here, I was prepared for the situation that I might be found to be of no real use, and in which case, I could just return.  And for the initial week, it was just like that. Though I was given an office space, I hardly found any work as such.  Then I started thinking of some projects and tried to sound the same to the director. When a high-level health supervisors’ training (summit) was being held, I was added to be the coordinator, which I took up, though with great hesitation.  In that short span, not even a day, I could contribute towards making the 3-day event more meaningful and better coordinated. Since I was counted as the resource person, I was about to be given my travelling expenditure.  I refused and then suggested, the money be given and accepted back as my contribution.  This was well received by the director, as the forum was struggling with no great reserves to meet its various contingencies.

The month-long stay was good – a new place, culture, people, relations.  It was fun.  I had got a hang of the organisation and the project.  It is a development (leaning more towards welfare) organisation functioning as an umbrella body for networking, fund raising, training, monitoring and evaluation. The spirit was low – like the passively flowing Brahmaputra which was visible from the institution.  I had no occasion to watch it during its period of turbulence.

Soon after my quitting, before a year, Fr Sebastian also bade good bye – which he was planning even otherwise, and having completed 75 years plus with meritorious service in various sectors.  In spite of the apparent rough and tough mien, he was a kind man and we got along rather well. 

Freedom after COVID19 - First flight after Covid Times 2022

This was my first flight in 2 years – from 2020 February to Delhi and this was the first on this very auspicious-looking day – 2/2/2022, that I boarded a flight. From 30 degree Celsius to 18 degree, and as I am winding up the day, it is just 13 degree Celsius.  I have put on a jacket, and am still feeling cold, not feeling okay to sit straight, rather gather myself closer together to feel warm.

From Kochi to Guwahati – Kochi presented a rather vacant, disciplined place, with very less crowd, and physical distance being observed to some extent. But the Indigo flight was almost full, and all the 3 seats in the row were occupied. The only way to feel a little safe was to have your mask on.

As I had more than 2 full hours, explored the possibility of free lounge access, which the Kochi lounge conveniently denied, whereas, in Kolkata, with the same list of companies, my card was welcome – for Rs. 2/- you had access to the basic facilities of the lounge – meals, cold drinks, coffee, tea… (I take it for another example of the Malayalee mind, rather than that of company stipulation). The Kolkata  lounge was fairly crowded.  I had four hours to spare – a few pages from Krishnamoorthy’s biography by Pupul Jaykar, 2 SIA (in the present format serving no intended purpose of SIA) meetings online and some lunch of dhaniya pulao & some form of ‘murg’ and delicious cold payasam…

The 55 mts flight over Brahmaputra to Guwahati was again crowded, and people were milling around the belt to retrieve their baggage.  Almost all were having their masks on. From the day of booking, the forbidding tone was evident – the exorbitant price of the ticket, with uncertainty looming large the extra amount involved in insurance, then the kind of coercion on the customer by leaving him no great choice but to reserve a seat with additional payment before you could proceed with the mandatory web-check-in, the formalities related to boarding pass and baggage tag, and the menacing messages regarding RTPCR and/or COVID vaccine certificate etc. finally, when it came to the real show, it all turned out to be a damp squib.  At the counter was Maria, wife of Bony, whose nuptial mass I had celebrated – she put me on the best seat possible, and without any hassle sent the luggage in.  No one was asking or saying anything about COVID or vaccine or RTPCR (except the perfunctory announcements by the air hostess, regarding social distancing while alighting), till I went out of Guwahati airport – there at the exit, there was someone asking for the proof of vaccine, and just presenting a digital copy of the same did the job, not even a scrutiny…

Guwahati was bustling with life – crowds all around, traffic jam.

I am at NE Social Work Forum, for a short stint of familiarising with social work scenario here, a learning opportunity – being out here as a learner, learning from the field, with veteran health professional and educationalist, Rev. Sebastian Ousepparampil, my good senior friend in the lead. 

Monday 30 September 2024

Musings on Turning Sixty

എന്തിരുപത്             - recklessly daring

മുറി മുപ്പത്               - ready to take up tasks/risks

നെറി നാല്പത്           - just and ethical

അറി അൻപത്       - wise

ശരി അറുപത്        -  integrated

തെറി എഴുപത്      - cursing

വെറി എൺപത്    - frustration

ചൊറി  തൊണ്ണൂറ്  - illness, irritable

കുഴി നൂറ് !               - Tomb

I heard this from venerable Fr Sylvester Puthussery - peace be upon him!! I think I have recalled it more or less exact. 

Typically, at 60, people used to get really old, in olden times.  It is called shashtipurti. I really can't
understand why this has become significant. If we look at the grand Indian plan about life - it is conceived in four quarters of 25 each - brahmacarya, gruhastha, vanaprastha, sannyasa. So, 50 should be a landmark. Perhaps, diluting it to suit the typical life expectancy for a healthy Indian, say 80, then 60 could be considered the entry into the last phase - sannyasa. In earlier times, a walking stick was provided during such celebrations, if any. 

At 60, I am feeling ok - okay! Feeling good? Rather, feeling not bad - except that in 60 years' time I have not really done anything significant - not contributed anything drastic to make the world a better place, though I have consciously tried to do good in most cases - trying not to avoid an occasion to do good.  At 60, 'aRi' and 'neRi' put together, I should be on the path of 'shari'. May the Lord help me thus!

Have I made the world a bitter place by my words or actions - I can very well remember at least 2 people who feel so - perhaps, more. But to those two, I have really not done any harm - however, they appear to sincerely believe that I have wronged them, and I must therefore deserve something bad - if possible, at their hands/mouth - the latter I have received rather in good dose by the kind of drubbing I have received from them. One on a public forum, the other by constant rebellion and questioning.  May they be well - sarvesham swasthir bhavatu

I usually start my day with the 7 mantras partly borrowed from Reiki. The first is 'Just for today, I shall show the attitude of gratitude'.  I have many things to be grateful for: 

At sixty, I still can  walk
Don't yet need a stick to walk 
My shoulders though now injured 
I  hope to soon get them repaired

I still can chew with teeth my own
And go about with the least concern
And still I hope to learn 
Arabic, Sanskrit I yearn

To learn the Bible, Botany I wish
As well as English and Spanish
In my bucket is endless travel
Laddak on wheels, Base camp on heels

And yet in my heart of heart, I like
To always Lord's will to seek
And in spite of my failings galore
To be on the Lord's favoured list for sure!

I am not leading a saintly life - I have also erred and failed in my promises to God.  However, at 60, I resolve to start again, to be holy before the Lord and people, to be good to all, and to be in the hallowed company. I believe in the communion of saints! 

At least some people, I feel, think that I live a daring life, I am adventurous, I take risks etc. to some extent, yes; I too agree. But in my heart of hearts, I feel I lead a very mediocre life - average! 

Erik Erickson identified the dispositions associated with various stages of development; there could be positive dispositions or negative dispositions acquired in a range.  Though these are not strictly to be found associated with any stage, they do provide insight for promoting positive growth in individuals: 

https://online.maryville.edu/online-bachelors-degrees/human-development-and-family-studies/resources/stages-of-human-development/#:~:text=The%20key%20components%20of%20Erikson%E2%80%99s%20model%20of%20human,and%20stage%20eight%2C%20late%20adulthood%2C%20integrity%20versus%20despair.

1 to 2 Infancy - Trust vs Mistrust
2 to 4 Toddlerhood - Autonomy vs Doubt/Shame
5 to 7 Preschool - Initiative vs Guilt
8 to 12 Early school years - Industry vs Inferiority 
13 to 17 & 18 to 25 Adolescence - Identity vs Role Confusion
25 to 30 Young Adulthood - Intimacy vs Isolation
30 to 50 Middle Adulthood - Generativity vs Stagnation
50 & above Late Adulthood - Integrity vs Despair

When I look back on life, in most of the stages, I have had predominantly positive dispositions - or I was able to see things positively, in spite of the odds. Regarding the adolescent age - though the identity aspect didn't become very clear and strong, I escaped almost all those turbulent years, with the steady atmosphere provided by the monastic seminary training. 

Definitely, when it comes to intimacy vs isolation, I feel I had led myself away from all sorts of intimacies, that I am almost fully isolated.  So far, I don't regret that much, not desolate about being isolated - regret only that it did not take me to the next stage of intimacy with Jesus or the antaryaamin. As someone puts it, 'alone with the Alone'. We - the Alone & me alone - are very much on talking terms - I can relate and narrate anything to him - at least with me, it's Him and not him/her (even when I am doubtful about Him being real), however, there is no such intimacy.  

In the stage of generativity, I wonder if I had been generative - definitely not posterity-wise in a physical sense.  But I feel, I should have been much more generative - reading, researching and publishing more - I was stagnant at that stage. Post-retirement, in the last 3 and half years, this was much better I should say, at least 20 articles - popular and academic, I have published. 

Now is the time truly challenging - will I be able to have integrity, and not to despair. Truly be the sannyasi - well placed/disposed/consecrated as I profess to be? I found my ammachi almost despairing, in spite of having been a woman of very positive dispositions till she became affected by old age accompanied by Parkinson's.  So too I find my aunt who leads a consecrated life, now almost in despair - she used to sympathise with ammachi for her plight.  I hope I will not despair, but rather, take things in their stride, and smile at the world. 

Trying to get the right dispositions as used to be accounted by late beloved Fr Sylvester, my sharp-witted friend Varghese, the apostle of entrepreneurial education, tapped Meta to get the following positive stages in life: 

"Twenties teach, thirties tame,
Forties establish, fifties proclaim.
Sixties shine, seventy sets free,
Seventy-nine calms, ninety contemplates, hundred returns to thee."

Then I decided to go meta Meta, and created the following lines:  

Train at twenty
Tune at thirty
Fight at forty
Fly at fifty
Steady at sixty
Serene at seventy
Easy-take-it at Eighty
Never-say-die at Ninty
Happy-to-go at hundred

With my knees and joints gradually getting affected, and my ability to play as I would like to is getting limited, I look at my life plans sceptically. The simple plan is to live happily and healthy till 100 and then leave the body for the benefit world, and vacate the space. https://prasantamcmi.blogspot.com/2024/09/my-will-not-my-will-but-your-will-be.html

I would like to have the Vedic blessing given to the seeker who prostrates before the wise (the elders): Shatamaanam bhavati shataayu: purusha:…”. I do my version of Suryanamaskar and when I do the step of ashtanga namaskaar, my mantra is: Om Sadguruve nama: - for me, Sadguru being the antaryamin as manifested in Jesus. 

I would like to have the Vedic birthday wishes fulfilled for me:  (Yajurveda 34:24)

तच्चक्षु॑र्दे॒वहि॑तं पु॒रस्ता॑च्छु॒क्रमुच्च॑रत्। पश्ये॑म श॒रदः॑ श॒तं जीवे॑म श॒रदः॑ श॒तꣳ शृणु॑याम श॒रदः॑ श॒तं प्र ब्र॑वाम श॒रदः॑ श॒तमदी॑नाः स्याम श॒रदः॑ श॒तं भूय॑श्च श॒रदः॑ श॒तात् ॥२४ ॥

Tattchakshurdevahitam purastaatcchukramuchcharat

Pashyema sharada:shatam jivema sharada: shatam

Shrunuyaama sharada: shatam prabravama sharada: shatam

Adinaa: syaama sharada: shatatm bhooyashca sharada: shataa||

May you see a hundred years, may you live (fully) a hundred years 

May you hear (good things) a hundred years, may you speak for a hundred years. 

May you remain healthy (free of illness) for a hundred years.  And you be there (with all these faculties in place) beyond a hundred years!!

To my happiness, I find several people sharing this day of birth with me: 

I remember our great teacher of Theology late, Rev. Fr Joseph Pathrapankal; my teacher at TISS, Dr Rajashree Maithani an excellent exponent of qualitative research, my classmate at TISS and now a very senior development officer with the Tatas - Shrirang Dhawale, my colleague at Rajagiri and its former student, presently CEO of Keystone - Jyothi Krishna, my colleague at Sacred Heart -Tessa Mary, my colleague now at Sitapur Neha Mehrotra, my nephew Melvin (also called Unnikuttan), my niece (in law) Annie.  I pray for all of them. 

It is a great day for us Catholics - whether I believe in it or not, the feast of the Archangels inspires me and challenges me with their invariable El in them - Raphael (wellness & healing), Michael (protection), Gabriel (communication), Ariel (lioness of God - nature, abundance, happiness), Haniel (energy, vitality, passion for life), Muriel (empathy & compassion), Uriel (light of God - openness to be illuminated by love of God - open palm).  (I find the ABBA song 'I Have a Dream' very soothing, with its mention of 'I believe in angel' and presenting a very optimistic vision of life with dreams and goodness. I am not sure, who discovered or invented them - clever 'guys' for sure. However, generally, the first three masculine figures are more familiar to our patriarchal world; the rest of them (perhaps, there are even more!) listed seem to be feminine, but are hardly ever heard of or discussed. However, they stand for (also implied in place of) God, without making the reference obvious, implying in them and through the 'el' in them, grace (God's presence) covering all aspects of life. 

https://www.ask-angels.com/archangels/