Chethikkalam – Rev. Fr. Mathew Chethikalam CMI (1965-2022)

In this age of disruptive technology, apparently making relations more mechanical, at least for once, this time, Chethi (Rev. Fr. Mathew Chethikkalam alias Sibichan – but let us stick on to the more familiar Chethi, in this write up), in a paradoxical manner, by departing from all of us, brought us together.  For the first time, so many of us, CMIs, other batch mates, former CMIs, sisters (nuns) who studied with us, all could come together on the zoom platform.  Many expressed a shock that it has begun with our batch too – spelling a count down of sorts for us too. (But we recalled that it had already begun with Jose Theruvunkunnel departing almost 20 years ago, and Theodore Toppo – 1985 batch – departing last year).  But all agreed that it was good that we meet now and then, as we don’t know whether we will all be there for long to see again.

Our ‘master’ Rev. Dr. Areeplackal, in spite of his health related engagements, took time out to be with us.  All stressed the factor that in his departure, he brought us together (for once). But also cautioning:

സമയമടുത്തൂ ദൈവമിതാ ന്യായാധിപനായണയുന്നു 

സ്വീകരണത്തിനൊരുങ്ങിടുവിൻ 

സത്കൃത്യങ്ങൾ ചെയ്തിടുവിൻ ...

പരിശുദ്ധന്മാർക്കവനേകും നിത്യാന്ദവും...

 

The gathering opened with a prayer led by Gen Councillor Paulson Paliekara, (who also managed the zoom meeting with liberal support of PG secretary Geo) and was followed by a brief description of the later days of Chethikalam, by our arch-organiser of the batch, Mariya (Joseph Mariyalayam).

 

Of the 50 odd newly professed CMIs of 1985, Chethi stood out – with his lean, mean figure, dark complexion, sprightly gate, piercing high decibel voice, enthusiastic presence primarily in the basket ball court, but also in volley ball, cricket or football (goal keeper) as the situation demanded.  I was struck by his energy and agility to go for the ball in the volley ball court, though his appearance there was rare, perhaps, only for the inter-section (house) matches.

The two years of philosophy training showed Chethi gaining access to all parts and sections (even forbidden areas) of the seminary.  He was free with almost everyone on the campus. 

He continued his studies in Christ College, and the late Bp Immanuel Pothanamuzhy (then, Fr. Giles) who was the section master, became a ‘daddy’ for him. And he could not refuse a demand for celebration from Chethi – recalled his Christ college mate, ‘our patriarch’ of Keralam, (Vazhoor Vazhunnor) Joshy Thadiyananickal.

His birthday, falling on April 1^st, all fools’ day, was some tool in our hands to make fun of him, which didn’t ever bother him. He was also enthusiastic in playing cards, including that of ‘support’, a game that required some sharp attention to the bids by others.

By the time, Chethi returned for Theology to Dharmaram, our 50 odd strong batch had shrunk to a pocket-size batch of 30 odd members.   Chethi was already transformed into a corpulent person, though he managed to keep his interest in games alive.   His interest in games took a twist – from player, he began to be ‘playmaker’ outside the court – in the sense of becoming someone who managed games and players. He was quite determined to be a referee in basket ball, and he earned that position by really working hard for that. He was so absorbed in its preparation, that our good friends came to know that someone was found in St. John’s hospital, going about whistling around, after blood transfusion – on enquiry revealing it was Chethi who donated blood for him.  Chethi had also put on considerable weight by that time, though that in no way hindered his being an effective umpire spanning the length and breadth of the court as demanded by the rigour of basketball games, even at national level.

Master recalled his being outspoken, but still obedient and entertaining no malice towards anyone. Once ordained, he was further transformed into a passionate pastor, who did not have to sacrifice a career as a basket ball umpire and someone who groomed players for the future.  This he managed by intelligently taking up the position of a primary school teacher (English and Social Studies), and grooming youngsters in the field. According to our scientist stalwart Dr. Baby, he was an outstanding sports person, who established himself distinctly in his field.

But being ever responsive to a call for the conventional pastoral ministry was irresistible to Chethi and he was ever available as a pastor. Perhaps, the newpapers announced his departure with the epithet ‘kalikkalathile itayan’.

Chethi is said to have found enjoyment in what he did – though most of the people would find them dull and taxing – school teaching, youth formation through basket ball court (and in turn, providing them a career path), pastoral ministry.  However, as cautioned by the letter to the Hebrews 10:25, he did not forsake the occasions created to come together as CMIs, as a batch, though he did that more for fulfilling his obligation to the batch, rather than getting involved in the merry making such gatherings would entail. He enjoyed life, but in his own way – found engagments that suited his call, and made him happy.  He was also a man of celebrations, wherever he was, he took initiatives for celebrating life – feasts held great importance in his life.

His sudden departure, at the (young) age of 57, came as a shock to many of us batch mates, especially, those who saw only the veneer of his being an energetic sports person.  But he was afflicted by certain illnesses for which he did seek treatment in the past few years.  It seems that in spite of having sought treatment, he had not taken adequate caution on that front, and perhaps, took things in a sportive manner, and sidelined the need for greater medical care in his thrilling engagement as a pastor.

His short stint as a pastor of Karumadi is said to have brought about a great awakening in the parish community.

Our sports star, and now the well established national award winning educationalist Dr. Thengumpally, spoke about his circle of friendship which exceeded beyond our imagination, and Paulson, former formation coordinator, vouched for the same by the very diverse and impressive turn out of his friends and beneficiaries, during the occasion of his funeral.

Our court poet Joshy recalled how they met in 1979 for the vocation camp, and how they were together as altar servers on the first day after their arrival in the seminary in 1980.  Paul, our novice master eternal, recalled from Africa, their invitation to Chethi to officiate basket ball tournament at Kunnamkulam, and how he enthusiastically accepted the opportunity to celebrate Sunday mass amidst the busy-ness of officiating the games.

Dr. Mathew, the former CBCI secretary for health ministry, recalled from US (together with Jose from Florida), how his vivacious presence, especially in the courts was unforgettable.

But on 25^th morning, he thus went away – without taxing anyone, without having to undergo any prolonged bout of illness and consequent hospital or medical treatment.

As our good friend, Puncha puts it: He has blossomed as an ixora (chethi) in God’s presence:

മറഞ്ഞിരുന്നാലും മനസിന്റെ കണ്ണിൽ മലരായി വിരിയുന്നു നീ

But as a man, the greatness of Chethi lay in his forthrightness – he would blurt out what he felt; circumspection was no great virtue with him.  He would speak out what he felt before anyone.  But he never harboured hard feelings in spite of the differences or disputes with others. That was the mark of his guilelessness and goodness.

Chethi’s unexpected (and untimely??) departure also cautions us to be prepared, but leave no normal measure to be taken unattended, to keep the great ‘means for duty’ (dharmasadhanam), our body, the temple of God, in tact, in good health. That is also a mission so that the greater mission(s) may be effectively accomplished, and that we do not become a liability and burden for others (though health, as such, is not something entirely in our hands and occasions of ill health also would have to be accepted with serenity).

Our gathering had people attending from Africa, Europe, America, Philippines, India (Gujarat, Madhya Pradesh, Karnataka, Tamil Nadu, Maharashtra) and different parts of Keralam. It was celebrating our sprightly brother, who went about doing good after the Master (Acts 10:38). Chethi goes away in glory with the reminder: it is better to wear out than rust out!!

Let me wind up this with what Dr Mathew Thengumpally shared on the occasion:

Fr Chethikalam was a popular priest not among the CMIs but among the public.. He seemed to know everybody in the world. And if he didn’t then, they know him now, I’m sure.

Fr Mathew loved his work. He loved his ministry. He loved to bring Christ to people. He was the bridge between people and God and he loved to do that.

This was written thousands of years ago . It’s a quote from the Book of Lamentations. “The favours of the Lord are not exhausted. His mercies are not spent. Every morning, they are renewed. Great is his faithfulness. I will always trust in him.”  Pranamam dear friend!