Raksha bandhan - Celebrating sisterhood - brotherhood - family

Rakshabandhan

As we celebrate this day, and I get a day free from office, I thought I would pen down my random thoughts for the day. 

The last day of the sacred month of Sravan (the fourth month) is celebrated as Raksha Bandhan in the Northern part of India. The most popular ritual is that of the sister tying a raksha - raakhi (an amulet or a talisman) around the right wrist of the brother. My coworkers tell me that usually this is done in the afternoon around 1.30 pm as that is considered auspicious for the same (I do a google search to find that the most auspicous time is between 1.43 pm and 4.20 pm for this year!).  The amulet is supposed to ward off evil and protect (raksha) the brother, while the tying of rakhi would imply the assurance of protection of the sister by the brother. Though there are well-known instances in history where Indian queens have sought such protection from more powerful male rulers of the region, essentially, this is a family festival and explicitly promotes the bond between siblings. 

There is an Indian tradition which speaks about the real scholar (naturally, a male!) based on his perception - perhaps education should lead to that stature. Of the three aspects, the first is 'maatruvat para daareshu' - the ability to see women who are not in immediate kinship as 'mother'.  This festival inspires me to tweak it to consider them as one's sister - though, not an easy task.  But achieving that status you are a learned person - pandita:! Another attribute for the enlightenend learner/scholar is the ability to perceive 'every being as oneself' (aatmavat sarva bhooteshu).  This appears to go along with the great statements (mahaavaakya) of Vedaanta - aham brahmasmi (Brihdaarnyaka Upanishad) and tattvam asi (Chandogya Upanishad)! If education leads to the ability (competency) of recognizing oneself as a God-presence and the other as the reflection of the same, treating everyone as if one would have treated oneself (as taught by Jesus, Luke 6:31), then the world would be Kingdom of God or Raamraajya. 

In today's world where in spite of all the big talk about the equality of genders, everyday atrocities against women are reported, such celebrations should go beyond the rituals to a collective resolve of ensuring protection for the more vulnerable sections of the family and the society, without making that a pretext for subjugation.  Even today, the Manu Code (9:3), often taken literally is the norm: 

पिता रक्षति कौमारे भर्ता रक्षति यौवने ।
रक्षन्ति स्थविरे पुत्रा न स्त्री स्वातन्त्र्यमर्हति ॥ ३ ॥

pitā rakṣati kaumāre bhartā rakṣati yauvane | rakṣanti sthavire putrā na strī svātantryamarhati || 3 ||

The other Manu statement on women, is often twisted to ritualistic sanctification which would further curtail the freedom of women. 'yatra naaryastu poojyante ramante tatra devataa: (यत्र नार्यस्तु पूज्यन्ते रमन्ते तत्र देवताः 3:56).  This calls for honouring and treating the women well. 

Unfortunately, this noble culture of protection gets confined to the homes, and at times takes a virulent form of over-protection, where the women are denied their rights to choose their lifestyle, profession or means of livelihood, life partner etc.  The changed contexts are not applied when it comes to the status of the more vulnerable of the society - it could be women, it could be those who belong to the lower rungs in the caste hierarchy. 

Selective Rage

The festival is happening against the backdrop of the raging anger against the cruel rape and murder of a senior medical intern at RG Kar Medical College, Kolkotta on August 9, 2024 night. The anger just doesn't subside and it is spreading, apparently in an organised manner. Understandable. However, I am really surprised that a similar incident where a young nurse working in a hospital in Uttarakhand was reported missing on July 31st and her body was found on August 8th in Bilaspur, UP and the perpetrator of the crime is said to have been identified and arrested on August 13th.  There isn't heard a whimper of a protest or there hardly is any rage about this woman's rape and murder. There is hardly any problem with any governments by anyone since the finding of the body on 8th and the arrest of the alleged rapist murderer on the 13th. Today, the newspaper reports the gang rape of a minor in Dehradun, the girl is alive and apparently with the Child Welfare Committee of the state. Yes, the gang is identified and those involved are arrested. 

I am unable to distinguish between this selective rage spreading over the entire nation over one elite victim, and hardly any mention or even reporting on similar incidents happening in other states - especially in UK and UP.  Or does it have something more than mere empathetic rage for the victim? Or is it because it has happened in the assumed safety of an institution - or a hospital (which have become soft targets for violence against health professionals)?

Right to Safety, Security and Protection - for Women and for Everyone, Everywhere

Today's newspaper also reports the attack of an AI stewardess in her hotel in London - indicating that the issue of women's vulnerability and need for protection is not a matter confined to India.  I recall instances of preying on women leading to rape and murder reported in the US last month. 

Protection of the life of everyone is the need and the right. A state can claim that it is a welfare state only when this is ensured. It implies that the state is a friendly place for all and it is tested true, when the most vulnerable enjoy such protection - the women, the ageing, the physically-mentally-socially challenged, the children! Where every individual citizen is 'honoured' and 'revered' as a dignified presence as guaranteed by the constitution of India. 

An Inspiring Model 

The Catholic church celebrates St. John Eudas of 17th century France this day (August 19).  

He founded a women's society dedicated to the upliftment of women who were found to be leading a disorderly life, rescuing them back to lead a life of dignity. 

 

He lived in an era where the Church had become extremely degenerate, with the higher clergy leading an ostentatious life exploiting the commoners and even waging wars, and the ordinary clergy ill-educated to guide and inspire the faithful.  He tried to reform by establishing an order of well-educated priests who would take up educating the priests as their primary mission. 

While it is fitting to demad protection from the state as a right, St John challenges us to do our bit to make our homes, our institutions, our communities safe spaces for all! 

My Sisters

Though we don't have any such festival in the South (or at least in Keralam), I have found our sibling bonds to be rather strong - they used to be.  Now being sort of away from such circles, I am not sure whether this is still so. 

Our student Soumya of II BCA is playing sister for all of us today. A first-time rakhi experience for me. 

Today, I remember my beloved sisters with love.  The three of them elder to me had been a great support to all of us as we grew up as siblings. I remember how well they managed their studies while taking upon themselves the daily chores of our small family of 9 siblings😀😃! I have also seen them delicately balancing their professional life actively involving in the same, while managing their homefront, not leaving room for any of their children to complain of neglect. Perhaps, in doing that they set aside the possible heights they could have scaled in their careers.  But I think they have no regrets, though, at times, I do. 

I also remember my sister-cousins - good many of them - with whom even now, we all maintain very healthy and warm relationships. 

Sisters and Mothers for the World

But I remember also those sisters, hundreds of them, who have left their homes to be the sisters of everyone in the world - many of whom were my teachers or promoters, who still treat us all with motherly care - especially those sisters of the destitute who have been our sisters thanks to the schooling we all received from them. My teachers Sr Elsius, Sr Gennet, Sr Lisa, Sr Barthol (+), Sr Christa (+), our headmistresses Sr. Lucy (+), Sr Florine (+) and several others including the beloved Srs. Philamine, Josephath (Roseline), Maris, Kusumam, Beena, Geena, Chrisalda, Ann (+), John Mary (+), Eusabia, Floria (+), Rozario (+), Rosalind (+), Evlalia (+), Donald, Bertilla, ....a host of them.  All of them dedicating their lives as per the gospel of today - Mtt. 19:21 - left everything and followed Jesus, to be sisters and mothers to all the world. 

PS.  Watched the movie 8 AM Metro directed by Raj Rachakonda, where a man and woman get to know each other quite unexpectedly, developing a friendship, and in the process healing each other. Felt good watching the movie told in a very simple manner, but indicating the possibilities of healthy human relationships that lead to wholeness - human potential for intimate relationships without the nomenclatures of brother, sister, friend etc. 

www.samskritabharatiuk.org

https://www.wisdomlib.org/hinduism/book/manusmriti-with-the-commentary-of-medhatithi/d/doc201361.html